My 28th birthday; I intended to think of all I hope this year could bring, what I hope for in the next two years before 30. Instead I have the themes of Deacon Dave's sermon from 2 days ago still on my mind. What am I willing to give, give up, surrender, sacrifice for the sake of moving forward toward Heaven... for the sake of holiness? Material possessions, comforts, relationships that direct me away from Christ, entertainments, dreams or plans? Is there even a harder question I could be asked right now?
Then this morning I read one of my favorite passages, 1 John 4, and it leaves me convicted of the imperfection of my love for God especially, and everyone else too. Not in a negative way, or a burdensome way... rather, it's this dawning awareness of what I would do well to hope for in the next year or two years: holiness - total abandoment to the love of God. The fruits, the ever satisfying fruits of living in and according to that love are what I truly long for, even underneath the shapes all my particular longings take.
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